Mystereum Tarot Monday Mayhem

03 Sep
Mystereum Tarot Monday Mayhem

So, if you are similar to me and a lot of other Tarot readers, sometimes we see and read things in simple images, in a tree, in a group of people.  Well, I thought, what the heck, it’s Monday and I woke up on the bright side.  So, enjoy this Tarot warm-up technique of reading 1st 5 spams in your spam email folder.  Heck, they’re free, and it’s a great way to loosen up, warm up, and get your juices flowing with a smile.  Then of course the ever important “D” word in marketing.  Delete.  Some things simply do not deserve your time anymore.

Think about it.  You are probably going to say NO! to most spams anyway, and I’d bet Tarot isn’t going to change your mind about that.  BUT, why not say a NO! with the higher octave of humor.  Humor is playing with the steps like Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers which is beyond learning them.   Dance with your steps to warm up today.  Today’s Monday Tarot Mayhem spam email topics submitted by Karen from the UK.  Send your contributions to be included in future Monday Tarot Mayhem blogs.  You can simply place them in the comments here for consideration.  Only type the spam email title and the snippet of the body text you can see without opening the spam, when it is unread.

Reading Spam As Alchemy, Serendipity, a Warm-up Exercise?  Sure!

Don’t be afraid to toss the banana peel so to speak after you get all the free goody out of it. Today’s Monday Tarot Mayhem Spam emails Titles/From and Subject Line snippets are . . .

Card 1 ~ Mark Habert. Business Proposal herbal roots supply

2 of Wands

  • The 2 of Wands indicates warning of potential disaster by overload and imbalance. Look for your natural path. Do not become overwhelmed by perceiving many little things as one big thing. Being aware when you are daydreaming is also indicated. See though the mirages of your fixations. Listening, waiting, and being on the move clearly is indicated to pull you through this time where you may feel barraged.
  • So, it is pretty much indicated to see past the Den Of sensory overload Iniquities, see past the blind spots. If I look for the overall pattern I might find the awesome Den Of Iniquities of that secret spot.
  • The Knock It Outa The Park NO! = Sounds like you should have made a Business Plan, Mr. Habert, BEFORE you got all the way to harvest.  I suggest a freezer so you don’t waste your bountiful root supply.

Card 2 ~ Mr. Paul Nwanze. Re: Your Atm Master Card Release

XVII The Star

  • The Star indicates continually finding your cosmic groove and going for it! Eternal hope in the diamond-like seat of your mind-body-beautiful is indicated to be sparkling brightly! The Star card indicates the immutable and vibrant presence of your memories, your hope, and your knowledge. The Star encourages you to shift your focus and re-direct your scale without moving the gaze upon your focus. Even the smallest star provides a glimmer of hope. This is a bright time for feeling your possibilities expanding!
  • So, is my ATM Mastercard incarcerated?  I’ll probably be more frugal if I let it sit there a while.
  • The Knock It Outa The Park NO! = Dear Mr. Paul Nwanze, Thank You for your consideration in this matter requiring the utmost urgency of my attention.  I suggest some milk and cookies on the ready ’cause that card’s gonna get AnCY and throw GATLINE GUN-level tantrums if you don’t give it the breathing room to go out shopping.  I’d say that I hope you’re a great card-Warden, uh hem, I mean babysitter.  From experience, though, I know better. If you have my card, it sure sucks to be you.  Don’t lose your key, Dood!

Card 3 ~ Chase Online. Security Issue

9 of Swords

  • The 9 of Swords indicates situations or events nearing completion or another plateau waiting. Feel experience AS the situation. Also indicated is that you have passed through the mental anguish of false summits. Though misery, suffering, and desolation may be present, the 9 of Swords loves that the path is clear, false summits and immediate horizons are trail-markers rather than destinations, and progress is being made!
  • So, it’s pretty clear unless I have alzheimers and don’t remember properly that I do not bank with Chase anymore even though their “We HAVE YOU SURROUNDED, New Mexico” map presence still makes me laugh.  What? The whole STATE’s gonna come out with our hands up.
  • The Knock It Outa The Park NO! = Uh, Dear Chase, I predict a long line at your Drive-Thrus today.  Your immediate horizon should be to not forget the obvious policy you have of making sure that fewer tellers are scheduled when you are busy like you will be today.  Did you learn that from the grocery store or vice versa?  You certainly have a way of taking the dynamism of this 9 and whipping it into a frenzied agitation of snipey communications all over the place, doncha?

Card 4 ~ USPS Service. USPS Delivery Information # Error ID4654

VII The Chariot

  • The Chariot indicates you are bringing powerfully diverse, internal forces into harmony. Indicates agility at speed in your process. Take note of your strategies as chariots typically engage from the side rather than head on. Look to the powerful forces in your life to feel where strain needs to be tuned back in to balance. The embodiment of stand-alone, self-nourishing connections is indicated in the agility of your actions. Shift and corner! This is a great time to feel the agility of your responsiveness!
  • So, I think I need to notify the USPS that the agility of their responsiveness is out of whack because they have an information # error and go so far as to assign it an ID.
  • The Knock It Outa The Park NO! = Dear USPS, Your Information # Error with ID exposes the chief problem with your system.  EVERYBODY knows the only # not in error is 42.  Geez. I know better than to be tricked by a 4-digit imposter when a 2-digit one will do.

Card 5 ~ Blog Advertising.  Premium High Traffic Blog Ad Software

3 of Cups

  • The 3 of Cups indicates seeking celebratory fulfillment working with someone or a group. Personal growth experienced by developing friendships and partnerships is also indicated. Note how trees help each other stay strong and healthy when they grow in groups.
  • So, DAYum right there!  Gotta get some Ad Software called MY FRIENDS to do some WOMM, Word Of Mouth Marketing.  OH, they already do that.
  • The Knock It Outa The Park NO! = So, let me see.  After consulting with my people, we have come to a position.  Our email addresses are ours, so we are Natives and you are Pilgrims Ad Software coming a invadin’ our addy beaches . . . We have a statement: “So let me get this straight. First, you arrive here illegally.  And, now you want us to teach you about corn?”

Thanks for warming up your dance with today’s Monday Tarot Mayhem! Part of

the Mayhem today was a big ole interesting ????? why did I nuke my Sunday spams? What was I thinking? How does Monday come back around so quickly? ZooooooooMmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!   Having to STOP depending on Spam sounds absurd, though if my be-prepared-and-finish-groups-of blogs-for-launch/scheduling-together I’d say hmmmm, I better pay more attention, huh?  Maybe next week I won’t trash ‘[em, but keep ’em all and INTERVIEW MY SPAM to see which 5 make the cut. LOL

Higher octave your week with humor!

Discover the treasure of the gifts that arrive when you say NO with GUSTO!  You’d be surprised at the table turner of humor.

“Laughter is the shortest distance between people.” ~ Victor Borge

“It’s a small world. But, I wouldn’t want to paint it.” ~ Steven Wright

Have a great week!

Take Mystereum for a FREE reading spin!  Mystereum at MyDivination!

Please subscribe and share.  Thank You!

All images and text (c)2010, 2012 Jordan Hoggard

Tarot in the Land of Mystereum is available signed by the author at

There are only four 1.5″ x 2.5″ copper Tarot Birth Card pieces of magic left at

Groc the videos at


Posted by on September 3, 2012 in Card Curiosities, The Mystery


Tags: , , , , , , , , ,

5 responses to “Mystereum Tarot Monday Mayhem

  1. pureblessedtarot

    September 3, 2012 at 1:37 pm

    There is a theory which states that if ever anybody discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another theory which states that this has already happened.
    Douglas Adams

  2. Christiane

    September 3, 2012 at 4:08 pm

    Thank you for another entertaining post! Tarot and Spam, what a great combination 😉 That’s why I have awarded you the Super Sweet Blogging Award 😉

    Wishing you a magickal week!

%d bloggers like this: