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Tag Archives: Grief

Your Mode of Being, Boundaries, and Being Yourself

Your Mode of Being, Boundaries, and Being Yourself

First, I do the coffee. Then, I do the things. ~ unknown

Love it! Mode of Being Formed at 3 1/2!

Love it! You reminded me of when I strolled into the kitchen when I was 3 1/2 in my diaper or shorts or whatever with no shirt. I politely asked my parents, “Do you want to go to Funland?” The response came back, “No, Jordan, not today, we’re making lunch.” “Ok.” And, out the door I went. They thought I was going to go play in the carport. Nope. I was not asking for permission. I was being polite, asking them if they wanted to go with me. So, down the drive and around the corner, and up a couple of blocks to the highway I went. Walked along the highway for a mile or so to arrive at FUNLAND!! WOO HOO! Funland. It was a local them park with bumper cars and cotton candy and ring toss and… THE FERRIS WHEEL. I LOVED the Ferris wheel. Tiny one, not a big one. It was big enough for me as I was 3 1/2. This is before cell phones, like 1971 or some such. My parents get a call… “Little Jordy is safe on the Ferris wheel, and we’ll keep him here, but where are you?”

Trees with strong roots smile in storms. ~ Malay Proverb

Exceptions to the Rules

🙂 Yes, you’re not supposed to scare your parents. But, no one said anything about terrifying them. So, scroll forward. OH BOY YES was I in trouble. It’s funny how you learn limits and some boundaries are set. Though, I did NOT like that much at all. In fact! The very next morning, same attire, I packed my Snoopy suitcase and ran away. I mean, what else could I do. They exiled my sovereignty. Common! I was 3 1/2 and I had a world to attend to! 😉

I Made It

I made it to the curb. Started crying. Sat down. The neighbor, a local newspaper editor came and sat next to me. “Well, Jordie, what’s the trouble? Why are you crying?” I remember the glare I shot her, and then I softened to, sobbing again, “Because I’m running away!” She smiled and softly said, “So, what’s the problem? Why so sad? That sounds like freedom.” Wiping off the tears I pursed my lips… “Yes! Not NOW! This morning they said I’m not allowed to cross the street by myself!”

How do YOU smile with your ears in storms to full-on hear the gift of BOOM n BLUSTER n ALL THAT you are being given by your internal world? What messages of your FORAYS in life do you tell yourself from what you did as a kid?

Thanks Much for Visiting Today.

My natural mode of being?… I can cross any street by myself now. 😉

We’ve been silent this past week for the most part. Serendipity Itineraries and blog articles will resume shortly after this wonderful conjunction of Jupiter and Saturn.

Blog (c) 2020 Jordan Hoggard

Road Closed. Pedestrians Only Past This Point. Dogs and cats encouraged.

============ ++++++++++++++ ============

EeBook PDFs by Coffee Currency

Pay In Coffee

My eBooks are straight up PDFs. No Kindle required. All 6 PDF eBook downloads are available for coffee. And, more are on the way.

Buy Me A Coffee

Download Your Fill. More Brewing.

Enjoy Coffee Currency Ideas:

Are You sending out a newsletter?

Here’s an idea. Attach a PDF eBook as a Thank You.

Do you need giveaways for that conference?

Use My eBooks As Marketing Giveaways

Pens Are Passé in the Pandemic, Give eBooks Instead

(You)(great eBooks) + (I get coffee) = !

Happy Sag Season & into 2021 We Go!

~ Jordan, Inner Gold Emanations

* Note: Tarot in the Land of Mystereum at Amazon and The Library of Esoterica at Taschen are purchased there, are not available by Coffee Currency. Astro Art Charts, Tarot Readings, Coursework also not included, unless of course you want to pay the amounts in the Shop in coffee and make a note when you do. Hmmm… That sounds fun. If you do, tell me in the note what you are interested in. I’ll email you to schedule and get you set up.

Blog (c) 2020 Jordan Hoggard

 
1 Comment

Posted by on December 22, 2020 in The Deceptive Simplicity Series

 

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Redux ~ Griefus Interruptus ~ To Discern Workability in Crisis Can Transcend Grief Formation, and Actually Gift You Excellent Stuffstance

Redux ~ Griefus Interruptus ~ To Discern Workability in Crisis Can Transcend Grief Formation, and Actually Gift You Excellent Stuffstance

First, I do the coffee. Then, I do the things. ~ unknown

When You Focus

When you focus on the ‘good’ or ’bad’ of your fellows, you make an opening in your heart for maliciousness to enter. Testing, competing with, and criticizing others weakens and defeats you. ~ Morihei Ueshiba, Founder of Aikido

Don’t

Don’t waste trouble. ~Jordan Hoggard


I Made

I made a diamond out of my misfortune. ~ Alejandro Jodorowski’s Chariot

You Desire

You desire to know the art of living, my friend? It is contained in one phrase: make use of suffering. ~ Henri-Frédéric Amiel

Crystal Clear

Crystal clear, sharp and bright, the sacred sword allows no opening for evil to roost. ~ Morihei Ueshiba, Founder of Aikido

When In

When in trying times, how can you step back to be more present within? How can you see through the expectation blind spots of the good and the bad? How do you discern the workability in a situation, crisis, discussion, argument, predicament, and/or danger?

When you do that, when you discern the workability in the situation rather than the blamestorming crisis-mongering… how are you able to better dial into continual solutions and resolutions? And, first off, how can you breathe, and simply discern that you do not have to attend every argument or conflict you are invited to?

Does someone stir something up within you? Cool. Can you put the clutch in when you get triggered, and simply use that energy to listen more intently without a peep? Or, without even a reaction rippling your serenity? I don’t suggest to forget it of course. I do, though, in fact suggest to remember it fully. Honor it. Revere it even. And, after the conversation, where you did NOT react to the trigger… go forward with yourself and engage that trigger… and… listen to THAT with as much amplified awareness as you did the person who triggered you. Listen to your Inner Parts. They need voice. And, when they arrive, something, a trigger or other, gave them an open portal. That often means they are ready to engage… Can you NOT engage them directly? Can you simply listen and experience what they need to jump around and stomp all over about? Let them. They may have coupled up Psyche Cabin Fever. Give them berth. When their storm passes… they may have a message for you after… but, only after you listen in Empathic Silence I find.

Trees with strong roots smile in storms. ~ Malay Proverb

How do YOU smile with your ears in storms to full-on hear the gift of BOOM n BLUSTER n ALL THAT you are being given by your internal world?

Thanks Much for Visiting Today.

We’ve been silent this past week for the most part. Serendipity Itineraries and blog articles will resume shortly after this wonderful conjunction of Jupiter and Saturn.

Blog (c) 2020 Jordan Hoggard

Road Closed. Pedestrians Only Past This Point. Dogs and cats encouraged.

============ ++++++++++++++ ============

EeBook PDFs by Coffee Currency

Pay In Coffee

My eBooks are straight up PDFs. No Kindle required. All 6 PDF eBook downloads are available for coffee. And, more are on the way.

Buy Me A Coffee

Download Your Fill. More Brewing.

Enjoy Coffee Currency Ideas:

Are You sending out a newsletter?

Here’s an idea. Attach a PDF eBook as a Thank You.

Do you need giveaways for that conference?

Use My eBooks As Marketing Giveaways

Pens Are Passé in the Pandemic, Give eBooks Instead

(You)(great eBooks) + (I get coffee) = !

Happy Sag Season & into 2021 We Go!

~ Jordan, Inner Gold Emanations

* Note: Tarot in the Land of Mystereum at Amazon and The Library of Esoterica at Taschen are purchased there, are not available by Coffee Currency. Astro Art Charts, Tarot Readings, Coursework also not included, unless of course you want to pay the amounts in the Shop in coffee and make a note when you do. Hmmm… That sounds fun. If you do, tell me in the note what you are interested in. I’ll email you to schedule and get you set up.

Blog (c) 2020 Jordan Hoggard

 
4 Comments

Posted by on December 21, 2020 in The Deceptive Simplicity Series

 

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Griefus Interruptus ~ To Discern Workability In Crisis Can Transcend Grief Formation

Griefus Interruptus ~ To Discern Workability In Crisis Can Transcend Grief Formation

First, I do the coffee. Then, I do the things. ~ unknown

When You Focus

When you focus on the good or bad of your fellows, you make an opening in your heart for maliciousness to enter. Testing, competing with, and criticizing others weakens and defeats you. ~ Morihei Ueshiba, Founder of Aikido

Don’t

Don’t waste trouble. ~Jordan Hoggard


I Made

I made a diamond out of my misfortune. ~ Alejandro Jodorowski’s Chariot

You Desire

“You desire to know the art of living, my friend? It is contained in one phrase: make use of suffering. ~ Henri-Frédéric Amiel

Crystal Clear

Crystal clear, sharp and bright, the sacred sword allows no opening for evil to roost. ~ Morihei Ueshiba, Founder of Aikido

When In

When in trying times, how can you step back to be more present within, see through the expectation blind spots of the good and the bad, and discern the workability in a situation, crisis, discussion, argument, predicament, and/or danger? When you do that, when you discern the workability in the situation rather than the blamestorming crisis-mongering… how are you able to better dial into continual solutions and resolutions.

Thanks Much for Visiting Today.

Blog (c) 2020 Jordan Hoggard

Road Closed. Pedestrians Only Paast This Point. Dogs and cats encouraged.

============ ++++++++++++++ ============

EeBook PDFs by Coffee Currency

Pay In Coffee

My eBooks are straight up PDFs. No Kindle required. All 6 PDF eBook downloads are available for coffee. And, more are on the way.

Buy Me A Coffee

Download Your Fill. More Brewing.

Enjoy Coffee Currency Ideas:

Are You sending out a newsletter?

Here’s an idea. Attach a PDF eBook as a Thank You.

Do you need giveaways for that conference?

Use My eBooks As Marketing Giveaways

Pens Are Passé in the Pandemic, Give eBooks Instead

(You)(great eBooks) + (I get coffee) = !

Happy Sag Season & into 2021 We Go!

~ Jordan, Inner Gold Emanations

* Note: Tarot in the Land of Mystereum at Amazon and The Library of Esoterica at Taschen are purchased there, are not available by Coffee Currency. Astro Art Charts, Tarot Readings, Coursework also not included, unless of course you want to pay the amounts in the Shop in coffee and make a note when you do. Hmmm… That sounds fun. If you do, tell me in the note what you are interested in. I’ll email you to schedule and get you set up.

Blog (c) 2020 Jordan Hoggard

 
 

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Conflict & Empathy

Oh My Is She So Afraid

I love fireworks. I’m from Texas. I don’t love guns, though I intensely like them. Heck, I’ve had too much martial arts experience and training to keep one around. If it came to that… that’s another story. I love lightning, and storms. And, I love motorcycles. Harleys, 1000cc crotch rockets on the Isle of Man TT. If I need a boost, I simply go there on YouTube and gig it like I’m the one on the bike.

But, and this is a big but. Not like the song.

I have a German Shepherd. She’s part wolf. Can see it in the face and tail and pigeon-toed paws built for speed, and the glowing Goddess eyes when the light hits them just so.

I once watched her continue to accelerate across 3/4 of a mile on an NM mesa. Faster and faster, just closing the gap on a rabbit who ran out into the middle of a literally mile-wide open space. Stupid rabbit. Wrong way to go. Though, there’s Nature. It errs sometimes. Or, does it?

Closer and closer closing the distance, until on the other side of the almost-mile the rabbit disappeared under a big boulder. A Greyhound would have had nuthin’ on what I experienced there hanging out with my chainsaw paused watching her full-gate run across the mesa and DAYum did she go through the gears. DAYum did she go through the gears, faster and faster and faster. The longer she went, the faster she got.

Though, back to… loves and intense likes. I love fireworks. I intensely like guns. Motorcycles are da bom, especially Grand Prix types at The Isle of Man. And, lightning… though, so long as I’m in the city and not above treeline with the lightning going off in the snow electrifying the whole scene not just where it strikes… I love lightning, too.

My Girrul, though, Lyra. She isn’t afraid of much, as one would imagine. Big dogs are often strong enough to be gentle, especially of course when there’s a positive part of no bad dogs, only bad owners here. She rules. She rocks. She is sovereign.

I effin LOVE her intense gigs, even when they frustrate the hell out of me. And, during these 5 times she certainly does.

Though, my Sovereign Girrul has those afraid points, and I MIND them when they occur. I talk about legitimate fear versus being afraid and anxiety kidnapping fear to distort it into being afraid, though her legitimate fears ARE AFRAID. I respect that. She’s got some shit, from before I met her, and/or naturally, that talkin’ to it, won’t resolve. A dog’s diff than a partner. The comms together to work that shit out don’t apply. She is afraid of:

Fireworks.

Guns.

Certain Motorcycles. Harleys and certain tuned crotch rockets (feels like the over 200+ mph ones… the really cool ones)

Lightning.

Shuffling cardboard. Like when you move. (Shaking head sad)

She’ll be 12 next month, or so I think. She was a rescue, pulled from the streets. She was fully groomed, only wearing an $80 deerskin collar with no tags. Those gigs set off some alarm bells early on to let her story unfold, though that’s another story for another time. Suffice it to say… No. that’s a story for another time. You learn someone over time. That deserves its own post.

Afraid Points

These afraid points she has? Full-on. It’s almost Memorial Day. The lightning gig-goosed her yesterday. Tonight, the fireworks and motorcycles zipping around literally scared the piss out of her.

It’s not the mess I have to clean up, and Nature’s Miracle to remove The smell. It’s… DAYum is she afraid! She gets like Mark Hamill in Star Wars. If she could get any closer and had a light saber, she’d slice me open and crawl inside to get out of the frigid cold of her fear.

It’s intense. It’s important. If I don’t stop everything, she will nuzzle-push between my chair and side desk tipping anything there over, which also equates to a Malbec or Carmenere on the floor and bleeding through the papers, books, etc that were spilled.

Again, it’s not the mess that’s the conflict.

It’s… Nevermind what I love, like, or full-on dig. She is SO afraid. I stop EVERYTHING so she can get as close as possible and hear soothing me-sounds. All I can do is close the windows, turn on the air conditioner, and turn up the Sonos to Phantogram or the Civil Wars o Meg Ryan or BassNectar or 7th House Radio or Jame Horner’s epics so MAYBE, just maybe, she doesn’t hear the fireworks and motorcycles and lightning and guns so intensely, or at least so much… and console her.

She is an effin Cerberus when she goes at something, though I have to say she’s pretty reserved about parsing that out. Kids? Shaking head. Not a problem. 10-month old with yogurt on his face? Turn to get a paper towel, turn back, and one lick-tongue across her lips… clean face and a kid just bouncing beaming laughing. Phewww. When that happened early on, I got it. I got her character. Without Psychological Projection or Projective Identification or even literary personification… DAYum. THIS is certainly MY dog. The apple didn’t fall too far from the tree.

I love her. My conflict frustrations and empathy considerations? Well, that’s an alchemy that will continue. When you can’t change or evolve or adapt something… well…

What cornerstone of what you can’t change in your life do you ultimately enjoy and HAVE to brace against?

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Thank you!

ImaginAction.

Your Life. Your Value. Your Call.

ImaginAction

(c) 2020 Jordan Hoggard

 

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The Improv’s Confucius Say…

Confucius Say…

Man who have mosquito land on testicles learns very quickly violence not best 1st course of action.

Moira’s Blessings,
Jordan

Note; Moira is an asteroid in Astrology that rules the internal sense of time and timing. Call her your intuitive clock if you will. She is Chronos’ (Saturn/Kronos) Wife. Chiron is Chronos’ son. I’m not sure if Moira is Mom or StepMom. Mythical characters have gossip column gigs like that down pat, in spades.

Jordan’s Journeys is sponsored by ImaginAction

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Download your copy of ImaginAction at no charge

No intent for it to be free. The cost is value, later, on your time.

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Thank you!

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Your Life. Your Value. Your Call.

ImaginAction

(c) 2008, 2011, 2012, 2020 Jordan Hoggard

 

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Thank You Tuesday

Thank You Tuesday

THANK YOU to every single person who has read, liked, commented, not liked though read anyway, didn’t know anything about though took a dip anyway for serendipity and found something, liked just to themselves without commenting or liking and left with something valued, even if just the smile or a nod.

Thank you all who have given my work a shout-out via words or a link on their sites. I personally like links more unless it’s a feature, keeps it more ad-free cleanly, and makes more of a community connective tissue. Thank you to all of you who have shared my blog on Facebook and other sites.

After I returned from my extended radio silence, I have seen my readers grow from 140+ to just over 200 in the last 10 weeks. I was in a Great mood when I returned, refreshed, though I smile at how many times I smile and get to say Thank You out loud when I see someone enjoyed my work, that they received something for their time. That makes me proud, and not the hubris kind of proud. That makes me proud in the “I Cherish” kind of proud. Thank you.

Thank you to all of you wonderful people who have read, share, and continue to read my blog. Also, thank you for inspiring me to write this. I may just make this the 1st part of a weekly series to mention those who influenced me or who I just resonated with. The intent will be to give people some serendipity eField Trip selections to choose from. A bit like Marco Polo returning with a full hull, a bit like a travel agent. Heck, it might even step up my serendipity forays, and I’m certainly game for that. Maybe I’ll call it Tuesday Thank You Trips. Hmmm, we’ll see. Titles are tricky sometimes, I’ll let it gestate until closer to next Tuesday.

Thank you to all of you wonderful people out there who participate in my work in whatever way you do, every single one of you! Whether you’re vocal or silent, active, or more Of a spectator. I appreciate your presence here. They say it takes a village. I say sure, a community of people all accepted for who they are without reason or explanation or apology. If anyone here ever feels uncomfortable, please speak up. Sometimes that indicates growing pains… for you, me, or both. Like a good stretch that breaks down some connective tissue a bit to regrow it stronger over the next several days.

Thank you all for being here. I appreciate you for that.

Moira’s Blessings,
Jordan

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The Fedora.

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Credit to Dr. Eric Perry’s post Understanding the Grief & Loss Cycle for inspiring The Fedora. I was glad to be reminded.

Jordan’s Journey’s is sponsored by ImaginAction

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Tip your server?

You can easily tip at BuyMeACoffee

Download your copy of ImaginAction at no charge

No intent for it to be free. The cost is value, later, on your time.

What do you think ImaginAction’s worth? After using it, on your own time, let me know by tipping at BuyMeACoffee, sharing, re-blogging, liking, commenting.

Thank you!

ImaginAction.

Your Life. Your Value. Your Call.

ImaginAction

(c) 2020 Jordan Hoggard

 

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The Fedora

The Fedora

I remember standing in front of my Grandfather’s casket at the funeral home completely perplexed as to why I wasn’t crying. My Stepmom, Lynn, observantly noticed my furrowed brow and the confusion in my eyes as I looked at him. She put her hand on my shoulder, and,”Jordan, you appear confused. Care to share?” I nodded, never taking my gaze off of him, and, “That’s not him. He was full of life. He was a best friend to me. Why aren’t I crying. It feels disrespectful.”

She nodded and quietly leaned in a little. “Jordan, it’s ok. Everyone grieves differently, and often, everyone grieves differently each time. Reason can be unreasonable here. Keep doing what you’re doing right now. It’s palpable. I can feel it.”

I cherish that moment, have carried the treasure of that perspective with me since. It firmly felt to be Acceptance with the quaternity of the other 4 grief stages as its heartbeat. Then to now, that moment is still the same, frozen in time, like trauma is always fresh. Though, this trauma, this influence, was treasure.

That afternoon, back at their home, my Grandmother took my hand and led me into their closet. Once in, she actually pennied the door shut or some such, basically locking me in. “I’m not letting you out until you steep in there a bit. I know how much you loved him. I know how much he loved you. We were married for 66 years when he went. I’m not letting you out of there until you steep in that feeling you’re having. It’s strong. And, I’m not letting you out until you find that one thing of his you feel to keep with you. You find that keepsake, Jordy, and I’ll set you free, but not a moment before, not up for discussion. Go on. Find it. Find what you need.”

I was in there a while. And, then I saw it. His brown and green tweed fedora from his 1st trip to New York in 1927. I’d always thought it was so dapper and dandy and all those great words from the 20s, and I was in my Roaring 20s. For the first time, I noticed his initials inside. ERH. I had never seen them before in the hat as it was always on his head, or flipped off and plop-dropped on the hat hook inside their front door.

I smiled.

Plopped it on just so like he did with a little flourish on the brim.

Knocked on the wood door of my prison bars from the inside, rattled my own cage.

“Ok, Nanny.”

“No foolin’ around here, Jordy. I mean it now.”

“Nanny. Ok. I’m ready.”

She opened the door, emancipated me with my new-to-me fedora.

She had never left. Sat on the side of the bed the whole time listening, listening in powerful, unseen witness vigil. Thank you, Nanny.

Such support.

Such support.

Thank you Nanny & Earl, and Lynn.

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The Fedora. It’s my fave hat.

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Credit to Dr. Eric Perry’s post Understanding the Grief & Loss Cycle for inspiring The Fedora. I was glad to be reminded.

The 5 Stages of Grief are:

1. Denial

2. Anger

3. Bargaining

 4. Depression

5. Acceptance

Grief outline portion © 2020 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED Dr. Eric Perry

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Tip your server?

You can easily tip at BuyMeACoffee

Download your copy of ImaginAction at no charge

No intent for it to be free. The cost is value, later, on your time.

What do you think ImaginAction’s worth? After using it, on your own time, let me know by tipping at BuyMeACoffee, sharing, re-blogging, liking, commenting.

Thank you!

ImaginAction.

Your Life. Your Value. Your Call.

ImaginAction

(c) 2020 Jordan Hoggard

 

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